Episode 65: Starting the Day with Connie

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Hello, and welcome to The Thoughtful Realtor podcast. I'm Connie Chung, one of the founders and partners of Willowmar Real Estate. This is a real estate podcast where we get real personal. Every episode we sit down for insights, stories, and conversations about all things real estate, running a real estate firm in California, and how we find our way as leaders and business partners.

Today's a fun one because I'm sharing my morning routine as a mom, a business owner, and a realtor, and the many other hats that I wear. I was excited to share this because I love people, morning routines, and learning about them. There are quite a few that I follow and I figure why not share my own? 

There's one vlogger in particular–her name is Nao on YouTube–and it's probably the one consistent YouTube channel that I follow. Basically it's about this woman living in Japan and her morning routine and it's just so beautifully captured. Anyhow, I figured I'd share mine and give you an inside peak to what it's like in the chaotic mornings of my life. 

Staying hydrated

I'm sure for you and for many who can relate–especially as a mom or working mom–if you're running a business, no two mornings are the same. No two days are the same but I will say one consistent [thing] in my life is that I will always start my morning with a cup of warm water. It's a little chilly in the morning, although having a cup of warm water just warms my body, and if I'm feeling fancy, and have the energy to cut a slice of lemon, I will add a little squeeze of that.

It's funny, the first home that I ever bought with Brian, my husband, in San Francisco, we added a hot water filter, and I will say, nothing beats instant hot water. If you're curious about adding one, it's relatively easy to do with most contractors. Plumbers can even do it if they can cut a small circular hole on your countertop and you can easily buy a water filter system and faucet. A lot of places like Home Depot even carry them these days. It's really nice to just have that instant hot water, especially if you are a big tea drinker or coffee drinker.

This past weekend was really cute because Mia, my daughter who's now seven, woke up early and set our dining table with everyone's drinks. She had a cup of milk for her brother and herself, a cup of coffee, and she made it clear that she did not microwave it–she can't reach her microwave–and then she even poured a cup of hot water for myself with some lemon that she mentioned she squeezed in there, which was just so cute to see how observant she is these days. It just warmed my heart  and at the same time, as a mom [who’s] very cautious, I was like, “What are you doing touching the hot water, holding a ceramic cup?” Of course, the worst things come into my mind of her burning herself or dropping the cup and breaking it. But, that aside, I gave her a little tip on how she can place the cup and pour the hot water.

Some Alone Time to Slow Down

I highly love my morning cup of warm water. It's also a nice way to just get a little something for me because once the day kicks in, the morning is so much about others getting things done, taking care of folks, so it's a small pause of just drinking to kind of cleanse and warm and detox in some ways.

After my cup of warm water, in an ideal setting if I am up before the kids–and usually I try to wake up a little earlier before the kids–although, my daughter Mia has become quite the early bird and sometimes she'll get up before me, but if so I like to just start my day, I will sit down, and write some thoughts that have been probably brewing in my head from the night before, or just things that I want to get done for the day. I try to just sit down, even if it's for a few minutes, and get them on paper because I know that will help me just process all the things going on. Also, for me, because I know I'm the type to want to get things done right away, my therapist gave me this recommendation that by writing, it just gets me to slow down.

It's so helpful. I don't know if any of you can relate, but I think I just have so much of the speeding of the mind where it's like, “Okay, there's so much to do, I need to get it done!” Sometimes there's anxiety that can build up because of the unknowns or just rushing, so the thought that I can take a few minutes to just put pen to paper, take some time for myself, get some thoughts out, slow it down, it really helps to set the tone for the day. 

I will say not every morning I write. There are often lots of mornings where I'm like, I'll get to that later, and sure enough, the day will pass and I will not get to writing anything. So, if I can really just remind myself to take that time, it's so precious because as a business owner, as a mom, as a wife, you're just catering to so many other people and their needs. Especially as a realtor, it's all client service and as a team leader, it's so much in service of my teammates, so this is kind of that moment to set the intention and just those few minutes to myself.

Exercise, Staying Committed, and Post-Workout Treat

Most days, especially on the weekdays, I really like to exercise. I did a tracking of my mood a couple years ago, maybe even just last year, where I would rank my days on a 1-10, 10 being the highest, 1 being the lowest. And I know the days that I had the highest rankings were mornings where I worked out and it was sunny with blue skies outside. While I cannot control the weather, I certainly can control if I go to the gym or not. I am the type where I like to get my workout done first thing in the morning because sometimes it is not the easiest thing to do and especially if I'm going to the gym before the day starts, usually it's a little dark outside and it's not fun to get up when it's still dark outside.

But I know that getting there pushes me: I sign up for classes. I recently had a back injury last summer from my gym. I think it was just too heavy on my back, which has always been a little achy ever since having kids and so I then got on Class Pass to try out different classes to really try to incorporate some more yoga and Pilates as a way to build my core back up. In doing Class Pass, it actually introduced me to quite a number of new gyms and I found one that I really like and I'm excited to start a membership with them and go to them more consistently, and have a more routine schedule and workouts. Because with Class Pass, sometimes I'd piecemeal classes, or I would let my day kind of get taken up by meetings and whatnot before working out. So I'm excited to kind of do the reverse, where actually I will plan my days around my workout, or at least have that consistent in the morning time.

I love doing classes, I love working out with people, I love being in the energy, and also it makes me committed to what I signed up for. I know I'll show up, I know I'll get a good sweat in that one hour time frame, and often when I leave, I know it just feels so good. Like it feels like you've done the hardest task of the day, and often it kind of is that way, so that every other task later on in the day feels much less daunting. 

After my workout, we'll run home, shower, get the kids ready for school and simultaneously I will try to make my smoothie, which I will say my second favorite household tool is my Beast Blender. I'm all about my long-time Vitamix, but lately I've been using this individual-sized Beast Blender. It's really aesthetically pleasing. They're kind of like a bullet blender where it's individual sized and it's just really nice on the eye. They have a lot of really pretty colors.

Anyhow, I will add oats to my smoothie if I remember or make the time. I will soak my oats overnight [because] apparently you get more nutrients that way. I love a good chocolate smoothie so I'll add some cacao powder. One thing I have noticed is that a lot of cacao powder does have like a metal or aluminum taste to it. I've tried a few different brands and one that I really like is called Nevitas. It just has a pure cacao flavor. I'll add hemp seeds, chia seeds for protein, collagen peptides–I don't know too much about the benefits of that, although for my friend, she says it really does help her skin. I'm all for that. I use the Vital Proteins brand that Costco sells. I'll add some pieces of frozen banana, oat milk, a little coffee, and some ice, and it legit tastes like a $14 smoothie you'd get from Barry’s or Equinox. It's a really nice, refreshing way to start the morning, especially as it's starting to get a little warmer.

Getting the Kids Ready

As I'm doing that, a lot is happening with making the kids breakfast, getting them ready for school. While my daughter Mia is more of a morning person, it wasn't always that way. My son definitely is a little harder to get up in the morning and so sometimes I will go and kind of nudge him and he can easily get very cranky. A lot of folks who have toddlers know this: you just don't know what energy you're going to get. Lately I've been doing this thing of reverse psychology where I'll kind of kiss him in the morning and I'll say, “Oh, do you want to sleep a little longer? Go ahead.” Funny enough, he'll say, “No, I want to wake up” or he'll just kind of start waking up or engaging and as a result I'll be able to lure him to get up.

We only have a 45-minute window from waking up to getting out the door so it is in that 45 minute to maybe even one hour, it's like go time and for a lot of you parents who know and have kids that you're trying to get up in the morning and get all the things ready, it can be very chaotic. Sometimes there's screaming, sometimes there's crying. Lots happening. If you've got a blender going on, it can be very chaotic. And so, I always have to remind myself to stay calm as much as possible and give my kids that grace too.

I remember chatting with a friend a while back and this has always stuck with me. So much in today's era, because there's that one hour, it feels so rushed and we're constantly rushing our kids. Come on, we gotta go, we gotta go, come on, eat your breakfast, let's go, brush your teeth. You know, all the things you have to remind them, that there are times where I try to not be in that rush mentality, even though I know we have a timeline to hit.

Also trying to move things along without that added pressure. I know it doesn't always help and sometimes you do need that pressure so it definitely is this balance as a parent figuring out how to navigate.

I usually don't wake up with a strong appetite to eat, but for my husband Brian, breakfast is his favorite meal of the day. For him, it's the most important meal of the day. He'll usually make some eggs and while I might not have an appetite to eat, sometimes I'll see the food and I'm like, “Oh yeah, that looks delicious. I'll have some.” And so it is really important for kids to have their breakfast before school because who knows? They'll eat, they'll have their milk, and then we're off to the races.

Surprisingly, we have lasted in Los Angeles with only one car. I'm very impressed. I don't know how we've made it this far. Especially with our kids going to two different schools as my younger son Mateo is still in preschool.

It's kind of a trade off, sometimes one of us will do the drop offs, sometimes the other. Sometimes my husband and my daughter will ride their bikes to school. Luckily it's close enough and I'll drop off Mateo. It all depends on what kind of day we're having or what's in the works of our schedules too, because sometimes I will go into the office so it makes sense for me to drop off; or it's a really nice day for the kids to ride their bike. We've made it work, and I will say though, definitely next year I'm looking forward to one drop off and seeing how that goes. It's such a privilege to be able to live close to the school that you go to. That makes such a big difference in timing and the luxury of being able to navigate walking to school, riding a scooter, bike, driving, or whatnot.

Days in the Office and out in the Field

Then after that, I am off to the office! On Mondays and Tuesdays, they tend to be the heaviest meeting days, especially with being a realtor, but also being a founder of a company. There's a lot of meetings with my teammates, a lot of mentoring of agents, a meeting with clients, and so I try to stack as much.

While I don't love it, especially on a Monday, it feels so nice to just be in that groove of having them all back-to-back and kind of carrying in that energy. I like being in an office space and I'm the type that derives energy from being around others, especially if I've got a busy day. It just feels nice to be in company and working, knowing other people near me are doing the same thing. It's sort of like working from a cafe, which I will always love.

With my job as a realtor, founder of a real estate company, there are a lot of meetings. Sometimes we're strategizing on how to grow our business, how to run the business, things we might need to shift, the tools we provide, how best to service our clients, new resources we're looking into or providing, so really, it's a lot.

On top of that I try to stack it where the other days of the week, I'm out in the field touring with clients. It's meeting inspectors at a property, prepping a listing, meeting with vendors, checking in on a property, touring homes, meeting with agents, getting lay of the land, so it's a lot of mix and mingle and sometimes they're not always as structured as that. Sometimes it's a blend of both, of meetings in the field and no two days are ever the same. And, well, sometimes it's chaotic but it's also what I love.

I definitely try to have a through line of when I know my days are going to be busy and stacked, to also enjoy the slow moments for myself and to not feel guilty about them because that is so key in real estate for folks who run their own company or work in the industry. There are some moments where you feel like you're barely catching a breath because you're responding to clients, you're getting ahead of things. It's a lot of hustle because there's just so much to do, so much you can do, and when there are down times, it can feel really slow and daunting because you're like, what do I do with this time?

And it can also feel very guilt-ridden and like, “Oh, I shouldn't take this time off,” and I've struggled with that and I've had to remind myself to know this is what you work so hard for and enjoy the free time that you have even if a little bit because as soon as it's over, things are gonna pick up and you're gonna wish you had that time for yourself again.

That is a bit of what my morning routine is like. I would love to hear what your morning routine is like, if there's anything that's consistent, if it's just as chaotic. What do you do for yourself?

So, thank you for tuning in to another episode of The Thoughtful Realtor. You can find us at willowmar.com or on Instagram at @willowmar__ and reach out to me directly. I'd love to hear from you. If you like personal episodes like these, subscribe and let us know in the reviews. I read each and every one. And until next time, bye!